M is For My Alcoholic Friends
by InfernumEquinomin
Summary: M in my Alphabet series. RyuukenXKisuke. Some days, Ryuuken honestly hated he even knew about soul reapers and the fact that Kisuke was too good at getting him drunk.


M is My Alcoholic Friends-- Dresden Dolls.

Fandom: Bleach

Pairing: Mmm, I could do just SO much with this fandom and song… I'm thinking I'll make it RyuukenXKisuke. Cause I'm twisted that way.

Rant: yeah, I heard this song and immediately thought "this is so Bleach!!!" and in all honesty, it was half this song, and half Mister Blue Sky by Electric Light Orchestra… Which is probably cheating but I do not care… Dresden Dolls makes my teeth grind if I listen to it uninterrupted for longer than ten minutes at a time…

--

Birds tweeted in the sky, sun blared down in glorious waves, and Ryuuken's face was planted in his desk, groaning.

He kneaded at his forehead and vowed for the thousandth time he'd never, EVER, allow Kisuke to talk him into drinking.

NEVER AGAIN.

The door peeked open and he glared up at his secretary.

"What?" he hissed and she blushed, looking nervous and flustered.

"um, well, you said not to disturb you unless it was Mr. Urahara and--" she started and Ryuuken felt his stomach drop as said man pushed the door open, wearing that terrible hat and smiling more than a man who'd drank as much as they both had the night before should be capable of.

Yet another reason Ryuuken HATED soul reapers…

"Ishida-ishi! How you doing sweetheart?" he asked sweetly, his voice all sing-songy and bright, and Ryuuken glared over at his secretary.

"Out. And ignore any noises of a potential murder inside." Ryuuken growled, pushing himself to his feet, eyes flashing over to Kisuke. "And hold all my calls."

"Ooh, sounds like he means business…" Kisuke frowned over at her as she quickly escaped, the door closing none too quietly in her wake, causing Ryuuken to wince. Kisuke smiled innocently. "Hung over?"

"Don't give me that innocent shit. It's your fault and you know it." Ryuuken spat, pouring a quick cup of tea and taking a sip of the now cold liquid. Best chaser ever, cold green tea…

"Now, I didn't _force _you to drink." Kisuke declared as he perched on the edge of Ryuuken's desk. Ryuuken glared at him.

"Just being _around _you forces me to drink Kisuke…" he grumbled and shot back his tea.

Kisuke merely smiled at him and kept quiet until he'd gotten a couple ounces of tea into him.

"Feel better?" he asked, entirely too smug, and Ryuuken cast a glare his direction again.

"Shut up. Why do I even associate with you?" he snapped and Kisuke smiled widely, pulling out that damn fan of his.

"Well, I'm attractive, charismatic, and I'm a great conversationalist and we have the same views of Soul Society and--" he stated and Ryuuken scowled.

"Okay, shut _up_, it was rhetorical…" Ryuuken stated himself, plopping back into his comfortable black leather office chair, one of the few luxuries he allowed his office, and Kisuke slipped off the desk, sliding around to perch on the arm of the chair like his own personal Mephistopheles.

"Do you like the number three?" Kisuke asked and Ryuuken wrinkled his nose, both perplexed and frustrated with the question.

"Why?" he asked back, sighing heavily and slumping into his seat as Kisuke scratched at the stubble on his chin.

"I dunno, Yumichika was going on about how it was a pretty number and that he liked it much better than four or five. I didn't get it." Kisuke muttered musingly, Ryuuken scowling and shuffling the papers on his desk, purely for something to do. Seriously though, he never got _any _work done when Kisuke stopped by, it was pointless to try…

"Neither do I. Why would I comprehend what a soul reaper talks about?" he grumbled and Kisuke leered.

"Well you're my resident expert on _pretty _things Ryuu-chan." he purred at him and Ryuuken glared sidelong at him.

"_Ishida_." Ryuuken declared adamantly and Kisuke smiled, leaning down and kissing him lightly on the lips.

"Ryuu-chan." he stated, that outlandish and utterly infuriating smile on his face.

Ryuuken drug him back into another kiss, this one heated and pressured to be returned and deepened. Kisuke didn't seem to mind and invariably slid over to sit on Ryuuken's lap, arms going around his neck to keep them together.

Ryuuken leaned him back against the desk and knocked the lamp to the floor as he pulled that ugly as sin haori from the man's shoulders and smiled a little at Kisuke deftly unbuttoning his shirt.

Can't live with them, can't live without them, or so they say…

--

Mitsuko winced again at the thumps coming from her boss' office. Honestly, she could handle the man's incessant smoking in a hospital, rudeness, haughty behavior, the way he looked down on positively _everyone_, and the way he treated his _son_, even in front of the other employees, but dear kami in heaven, if he came out covered in blood from bludgeoning that kind old shopkeeper to death she was NOT covering for him…

Not for _that_ pathetic excuse for a paycheck…

End.

I thought it was good but then again, I wrote it, I'm somewhat biased.


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